I was part of a movement of "dinosaur moms" when I lived in Maryland (Astrodon Johnstoni is the Maryland state dinosaur.) Which is nothing more than this -- dinosaur moms delight in the half-feral nature of the beasties they parent, even as they whisper Shakespeare and Kierkegaard in their ears at night.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Dialogue a lot

I got this e-mail from Stepmother today. It was sent to me and my sister.

"I am going to start a tradition of writing to the two of you for 1 purpose and 1 purpose only -- that the two of you know a little more about your Dad and me over the course of the year. Although I have been part of your lives for the past 21 years I know you don't know a quarter of what I would like you to know about me. Some of that is due to distance, both objectively and subjectively, and in a lot of ways I don't think you know your Dad, especially as he would like you to.

If either of us would die today, and you reflected on your relationship with us, what would you think? and how would you tell our stories to your children? Your children, and their children behind them, are the only evidence that your Dad and Mom walked this earth and made a measure of contribution. How would that be played? Well the only way to find out is to dialogue and dialogue a lot.

I see a lot of your Dad in each of you, but in very different ways. Which is a helpful piece of information because you can't go forward without knowing where you come from. Likewise, before I "Cross over Jordan" I want you to know me and I you. There are many things I would like to say to each of you that I think can help you in your journey as women and, instead of not sharing, I am taking the first step.

This is my 1st week's attempt and the good Lord willing and the creek don't rise each week I will share more!

Have a GREAT day and talk with you soon!" and then she signs.

Now, I am trying not to be cynical about this, but you can imagine some baggage has accumulated over those 21 years. I don't know how to take an invitation to dialogue that so obviously doesn't invite dialogue.


PortraitPlaytime said...


Dinosaur Mom said...

OMG, this may be worse than the trip scrapbook thing from Girl's China trip.

Astrodon Johnstoni said...

Oh yeah. I owe this blog's dubious readership some excerpts from THAT oeuvre.